Inclusive language guide

What is LGBTIQ+ inclusive language?

The Inclusive language guide is for all Allens employees. It explains how to use language respectfully and inclusively when working with and referring to LGBTIQ+ colleagues and clients. Using inclusive language is imperative in demonstrating respect in our workplace and community by acknowledging the diversity of the people we work with.

How to foster inclusive language

Don’t assume everyone is heterosexual

Don’t assume that everyone is heterosexual (straight), or that this is the norm. Avoid using language such as ‘wife’ or ‘husband’ that assumes all relationships are heterosexual, as this excludes non-heterosexual people and devalues their relationships. Words and phrases such as ‘partner’, ‘parents’, ‘relationship’, ‘in a relationship’ are examples of LGBTIQ+ inclusive language.

Avoid language that assumes all people are women or men

Whether you are addressing a meeting, writing a letter or greeting someone on the phone, there are various ways you can use language which is welcoming to everyone. For example, you can use terms such as:

Welcome everyone
Good morning folks
Hello all

When addressing people in email or letters, where possible, copy the title the person uses for themselves in their correspondence (i.e. in their email signature). If the person doesn’t use a title, don’t apply one, and simply address the person by their first and last name.

When speaking to people on the phone, it is important to remember that the sound of a person’s voice isn’t a reliable indicator of their gender, particularly over the phone. Do not address someone on the phone by gendered terms such as ‘madam’ or ‘sir’ if you don’t know their gender. Ask and call them by their name.

Accept and respect how people identify and define their gender and sexuality

It is important to remember that, no matter what the descriptions below say, you should always use the terms someone uses to describe themselves, rather than making an assumption.

Don’t use language that suggests being LGBTIQ+ is a choice

Avoid asking people what terms they ‘prefer’. Having a ‘preference’ can sound as if it’s a choice and most people do not feel as if they have a choice in these matters. If you need to, you can simply ask people what terms they use.

Don’t ask if you don’t have to

We all have a right to privacy. We should only have to bring as much of our private selves to work as we want to and feel safe doing. Allow yourself to be led by how someone talks about themselves, their family and their relationships. Ask or be guided by them about who to share this information with.

Many LGBTIQ people get asked a lot of questions about LGBTIQ experiences, issues or terminology. While it’s good to check in with a person’s individual terms, they shouldn’t be expected to speak for diverse communities. One guiding principle is not to ask someone a question if you would feel uncomfortable answering it yourself.

Pronouns

Pronouns are one way people refer to each other and themselves. Most but not all men (including trans men) use the pronoun ‘he’. Likewise, most but not all women (including trans women) use the pronoun ‘she’. Some people use a gender-neutral pronoun such as ‘they’ (e.g., “Pip drives their car to work. They don’t like walking because it takes them too long”).

If you’re unsure what someone’s pronoun is, you can ask them respectfully, and preferably privately. Use a question like “Can I ask what pronoun you use?”. Do not ask “What pronoun do you prefer?”. A person’s pronoun and identity are not a preference. Instead, just ask what pronoun they use.
Some people’s pronouns may be context-specific. For example, someone might not use their pronoun in a particular environment or around particular people because they do not feel safe or comfortable to do so.

What if I make a mistake?

No one will get the language right 100 percent of the time for 100 per cent of people. People may worry that they will offend or be embarrassed if they use the wrong term, name or pronoun, particularly for trans and gender diverse people.
It’s important to try to use respectful language and some mistakes are understandable, particularly when you are learning. If you make a mistake, apologise promptly and move on. Don’t dwell on it, and don’t give up – keep trying to get it right.

However, repeated mistakes indicate a lack of respect, and can be very distressing. If the use of incorrect terms, names or pronouns continues or is deliberate, it could constitute bullying or discrimination which is unlawful.

Commonly used terms

Use: Gay

Avoid: Homosexual. ‘Gay’ (pejorative or adjective) eg ‘that’s so gay’.

Why? Gay is an adjective, not a noun. A gay person is romantically and/or sexually attracted to people of the same sex and/or gender as themselves. This term is often used to describe men who are attracted to other men, but some women and gender diverse people may describe themselves as gay.

It is important to recognise that many people who identify as bisexual or lesbian do not appreciate being referred to as gay. It is therefore best to avoid using gay as an all-encompassing term, and instead if you need to use a term, use whichever term the person you are speaking with uses to identify themselves.

Use: Lesbian

Avoid: Gay. Homosexual.

Why? A lesbian woman is romantically and/or sexually attracted to other women.

As mentioned above, many women who identify as lesbian do not appreciate being referred to as gay. It is therefore best to avoid using gay as an all-encompassing term, and instead if you need to use a term, use whichever term the person you are speaking with uses to identify themselves.

Use: Bisexual

Avoid: Gay. Lesbian.

Why? A bisexual person is romantically and/or sexually attracted to people of their own gender and other genders.

As mentioned above, many people who identify as bisexual do not appreciate being referred to as gay or lesbian. It is therefore best to avoid using gay as an all-encompassing term, and instead if you need to use a term, use whichever term the person you are speaking with uses to identify themselves.

It is also inappropriate to suggest to a bisexual person that their sexuality is ‘just a phase’ and they’ll eventually choose to be gay or straight, or to ask what percentage they are attracted to men versus women.

Use: Asexual

Why? An asexual person does not experience sexual attraction, but may experience romantic attraction towards others.

It is inappropriate to suggest that an asexual person ‘just hasn’t found the right person yet’.

Use: Pansexual

Why? A pansexual person is romantically and/or sexually attracted to people of all genders, binary or non-binary.

Use: Queer

Avoid: Queer as used as a slur

Why? Queer is often used as an umbrella term for diverse genders or sexualities. Some people use queer to describe their own gender and/or sexuality if other terms do not fit. However, for some people, especially older LGBTIQ+ people, ‘queer’ has negative connotations, because in the past it was used as a derogatory term.

Queer is not usually a term Allies should use, but is rather a term which is used by LGBTIQ+ people in an empowering way or to describe themselves.

Use: Orientation. Sexual Orientation.

Avoid: ‘Sexual preference’. ‘Gay lifestyle’. ‘Homosexual lifestyle’. ‘Same-sex attractions’. ‘Sexual identity’.

Why? The term ‘sexual preference’ is used by anti-gay activists to suggest that having a diverse sexual orientation is a choice, and therefore something that can be changed or ‘cured’. Similarly, the term ‘gay lifestyle’ is used to stigmatise gay people and suggest that their lives should be viewed only through a sexual lens. Just as one would not talk about a ‘straight lifestyle’, don’t talk about a ‘gay lifestyle’.

Use: Openly gay/bi/trans

Avoid: ‘Admitted he was gay/bi/trans’

Why? Although ‘gender’ and ‘sex’ are sometimes used interchangeably, this is incorrect.

Sex is usually categorized as female or male but there is variation in the biological attributes that comprise sex and how those attributes are expressed. Gender refers to the socially constructed roles, behaviours, expressions and identities of girls, women, boys, men, and gender diverse people.

Use: Gender. Sex.

Avoid: ‘Gender’ and ‘sex’ are not interchangeable

Why? Although ‘gender’ and ‘sex’ are sometimes used interchangeably, this is incorrect.

Use: Intersex

Avoid: ‘Hermaphrodite’

Why? An intersex person is born with atypical natural variations to physical or biological sex characteristics such as variations in chromosomes, hormones or anatomy. Intersex traits are a natural part of human bodily diversity.

Not all intersex people use the term.

Use: Transgender/Trans

Avoid: ‘Transgendered’. ‘A transgender’ (n.). ‘Transgenders’ (n.). ‘Transexual’. ‘Transvestite’. ‘Tranny’.

Why? Transgender is an adjective, not a noun. Be careful not to call someone ‘a transgender.’ Do not add an unnecessary ‘-ed’ to the term (‘transgendered’), which connotes a condition of some kind. Never use the term ‘transvestite’ or ‘transexual’ to describe a transgender person. This are historical and outdated terms that are considered offensive today.

Use: Gender affirmation

Avoid: ‘Sex change’. ‘Sex-change operation’. ‘Pre-operative’/’post-operative’. ‘Pre-op’/’post-op’. ‘Transition’.

Why? Gender affirmation is the process where a trans or gender diverse person takes steps to socially and/or physically feel more aligned with their gender. For people affirming their gender, having their gender recognised at work can be an integral part of this process.

Gender affirmation is the accurate term that does not fixate on surgeries, which many transgender people do not or cannot undergo. Terms like ‘pre-op’ or ‘post-op’ unnecessarily fixate on a person’s anatomy and should be avoided.

If you are specifically discussing surgery in an appropriate context, the appropriate terminology is ‘gender affirmation surgery’.

Although ‘transition’ is often used, ‘gender affirmation’ is the more accurate term as it doesn’t necessarily mean changing gender, ‘having a sex change’ or ‘becoming a man or a woman’, and transition isn’t synonymous with being trans.

Use: Non-binary. Gender fluid.

Avoid: ‘Androgynous’. ‘Hermaphrodite’. ‘Unisex’.

Why? Non-binary is an umbrella term for people whose gender identity doesn’t sit wholly within the binary of ‘man’ or ‘woman’. Non-binary identities are varied and can include people who identify with some aspects of binary identities, while others reject them entirely.

‘Androgynous’ and ‘unisex’ refer to the outward gender appearance of a person, rather than their gender identity. While some non-binary people may appear androgynous, others may not.

‘Hermaphrodite’ refers to a person having both male and female reproductive organs.

Use: Gender diverse

Why? Gender diverse generally refers to a range of genders expressed in different ways. As outlined above, there are many terms used by gender diverse people to describe themselves.

Gender diverse can be used to describe gender identities that demonstrate a diversity of expression beyond the binary, for example trans, non-binary, gender fluid.

Use: Marriage

Avoid: 'Gay marriage'

Why? Just as it would be inappropriate to call the marriage of two older people ‘elder marriage’, it is inappropriate to call the marriage of a samegender couple ‘gay marriage’.

Use: Intolerance. Rejection. Exclusion. Unfairness. Hurtfulness.

Avoid: ‘Hate’/’hatred’. ‘Bigot’/’bigots’/’bigotry’. ‘Prejudice’.

Why? Avoid highly charged, argumentative terms like ‘hate’ and ‘bigotry’, which are likely to alienate people. Instead, use language that is measured and relatable to create empathy and a sense of how rejecting attitudes and actions hurt LGBTIQ+ people.

Extracted and adapted from:

GLAAD and MAP’s Ally’s Guide to Terminology:
http://www.glaad.org/sites/default/files/allys-guide-to-terminology_1.pdf;
and
The Victorian Government’s LGBTIQ Inclusive Language Guide:
https://www.vic.gov.au/sites/default/files/2019-06/LBGTIQ-Inclusive-Language-Guide.pdf